Getting Help From Counseling

3 Ways To Prepare For Couple’s Counseling

Posted by on 4-04-16 in Uncategorized | Comments Off on 3 Ways To Prepare For Couple’s Counseling

If you and your partner have decided to pursue couple’s counseling together, it helps to get prepared before you go in together for your first session. That way, you can ensure that you get the most out of the experience.  #1 Understanding You Are Responsible For Fixing Your Relationship The first thing you need to do is understand that you are responsible for fixing your relationship, not your counselor. Your counselor may guide your session, and help illuminate and provide a safe place for you and your partner to work on your issues, but at the end of the day fixing your relationship rests on the shoulders of you and your partner.  Both of you have to be willing to be honest and open during therapy. You have to also be open to really listening to what the other person says. Finally, you have to be willing to make changes and adjustments to your relationship. Your counselor is just a tool that can help guide you to that end; to get there, you have to put in the work yourself.    #2 Think About Your Role Within Your Relationship The second thing you need to think about in order to prepare for your therapy sessions is your role within your relationship. Your counselor is going to want to explore the relationship dynamic between you and your partner during your first session. This exploration can go a lot smoother if you and your partner have both taken time before going into therapy to think about and reflect on the role that you both feel that you play in your relationship. You need to think about how you relate to one another. You need to consider both the positive aspects that you bring to your relationship and any negative roles that you play as well. Identifying and discussing both of these aspects of your relationship will help you move forward.  Try to think or journal about what you feel your role is before you go into your therapy session so that you have some developed thoughts.  #3 Think About What Your Relationship Means To You The third thing you need to think about is what your relationship means to you. It can be easy to focus on negative when you are going to counseling. Before you go in, think and perhaps journal about what your relationship really means to you. Think about what it has meant to you in the past and in the present. Then, assess your feelings and think about how willing you are to make changes to make your relationships work. Thinking about what brought you both together can help you move forward with your relationship through counseling. By doing a little mental prep work either on your own or with your partner before you go in for couples counseling (from a professional such as Dr Susan Goldsmith) can allow you to get the biggest benefit out of your sessions....

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Did You Cause My Child’s Borderline Personality Disorder?

Posted by on 6-06-15 in Uncategorized | Comments Off on Did You Cause My Child’s Borderline Personality Disorder?

When your adolescent (or adult) child has been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, you might wonder if you caused this condition by using poor parenting skills.  You may comforted to know that the latest research indicates that there is much more to the origin of this disorder, and the difficulties you have had parenting a BPD child may also be traced to their genetics and physiological characteristics. Environment The incidence of BPD is estimated to affect of 2% of the population and is more prevalent than bipolar disorder or schizophrenia. There has been plenty of research into the environmental causes of personality disorders, but the goal is not to blame the parents. It is to find ways to prevent and better treat these conditions. Childhood abuse and neglect have been frequently cited as causes for BPD, but although these can be factors, it does not explain the fact that some people who have this disorder come from concerned and loving families. An invalidating environment is also cited as a cause of BPD and this is one where parents tend to discount the child’s feelings, emotional reactions, and conclusions. This can be done by ignoring, judging, or denying their expressions. However, many parents have complained that the sensitivities and reactions of the children with these tendencies began very early and were over-the-top. This has caused them much frustration trying to figure out how to deal with them. Genetics There is some significant evidence that the tendency to develop personality disorder is genetic. Genetic researchers have found that the ninth chromosome can be linked to BPD tendencies. Older research has indicated that up to 42% of these tendencies are attributable to genetic material. Research is ongoing to further identify the genetic causes of personality disorder development, and this could have important implications for treatment of this condition. Physiological Brain Characteristics From brain imaging scans, researchers have concluded that PBD patients lack the ability to use neurological networks that would help them control their emotions, and they physically unable to regulate normal responses to the resulting feelings. When participants in the research were shown disturbing emotional scenes, healthy people showed activity in their anterior cingulate cortex and also the intraparetical sulci (areas of the brain) as they worked to control their reactions. BPD clients showed no such activity in their brains. This research explains why BPD patients display such extreme reactions and behavior to various situations that average people would find merely annoying or slightly uncomfortable. Help It is evident from the ongoing research that there is still much to be learned about this baffling disorder. There are several things you can do to help your child, whether they are a minor or an adult. The first thing is to help them seek and continue getting professional treatment. This often include medication and specialized counseling called dialectical behavior therapy (DBT). You would also benefit from supportive therapy to learn effective ways to deal with your child’s emotional difficulties and temperament, as well as to cope with its challenges in your life. For more information, click...

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Find Out If Your Child Has A Learning Disability By Getting A Psychoeducational Assessment

Posted by on 4-04-15 in Uncategorized | 0 comments

As a parent, it can be hard to tell if your child has actual learning problems, or if he or she is just being lazy with schoolwork. If you have a child that is not doing well in school, you may wonder why this is happening. To find out, you could have a psychoeducational assessment completed on your child, and this type of testing will reveal a lot of different details about your child. What is a psychoeducational assessment? A psychoeducational assessment is a thorough test that is usually completed by a psychologist or counsellor. The assessment tests the child in numerous areas and looks for problems related to learning, and some of the things you will learn from the testing include details about your child’s: Learning style Strengths and weaknesses Possible neurological issues By finding out this information, you will know whether your child has a learning disability or not, but that is not all you will find out from this. How will this help? A thorough psychoeducational assessment often takes up to several days to complete because it involves observing the child, talking to the child’s teacher, and written testing the child must complete. When the testing is finished, the psychologist will spend time analyzing the results, and you will receive a written report of the findings. This type of assessment can help in many ways, including: Gaining an understanding of the child’s problems Addressing the correct problems the child has Finding ways to overcome the weaknesses Ultimately, you will know what the next steps to take are because the results will tell you where the child is lacking. This will provide you with the information you need to focus on the right areas, and it will give you advice about how to help your child improve in these areas. If the testing comes back as normal, you will then have a better understanding of how to help your child overcome his or her attitude and habits towards school work. The results can also be useful to give to your child’s teacher. If the teacher understands the child’s learning style and problems, he or she may be able to provide better instruction for the child. If you are interested in getting your child tested, contact a company that offers counselling services for children. They may be able to complete the assessment for you, and this will be a good step to take to help your child succeed in...

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Do You Suspect That Your Child Is Suffering from Depression?

Posted by on 3-03-15 in Uncategorized | 0 comments

Children can become temporarily sad and mildly depressed the same as healthy adults. Should your child continue to be sad or depressed beyond a reasonable amount of time, you as a parent may become justifiably concerned. Clinical depression is a mental illness that affects people of all ages, including children under the age of thirteen. Signs of Depression in Children There are signs that point to depression in children. Be aware that these symptoms are not exclusive of clinical depression in children; they are also symptoms that relate to other physical and mental illnesses. Sadness or grief that seems to be worsening over time Sadness or grief that won’t go away Frequent crying Talk of wanting to die Loss of interest in school, or grades and class work suffering where it wasn’t in the past Loss of interest in friends Loss of interest in activities that the child used to enjoy Feelings of hopelessness Low self-esteem Frequent expressions of guilt Decreased energy, increased fatigue If your child is exhibiting these symptoms, or other changes that have you concerned, it’s important to seek the help of a medical professional. Importance of Getting Help for Your Child Depression can lead to self-destructive behavior in children. It is a treatable disease, making it imperative that you have your child seen by a psychiatrist. Once a diagnosis is made, treatment will be able to begin. The treatment for depression in children usually involves psychotherapy and may involve medication. With the help of a child psychologist, a depressed child can learn how to express and cope with their feelings. Family members may also be invited to therapy sessions. This helps everyone learn how to best deal with the child’s illness. (For more information, contact Paula Conforti, D.C.S., C.Psych. Assoc.) Medication for Children Who Suffer from Depression Many parents don’t like the idea of their child being on medication for depression. If you have concerns, you should talk them over with a child psychiatrist. Your child should never be on medications to treat depression without being under the care of a psychiatrist. Certain antidepressants are safe and effective, but only when monitored by a psychiatrist. The doctor will watch for side effects and make dosage adjustments as necessary. Untreated depression has the potential to lead to serious self-destructive behaviors. The Canadian Mental Health Association states that only one out of every five Canadian children in need of mental health services receives the help they need. If you suspect your child is one of these sufferers, you shouldn’t wait to get them the help they...

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